Hello, my name is Samuel. I am a happy, 43-year-old bachelor living in New York. I consider myself A Man Going His Own Way (MGHOW).
I also consider myself a leader in a new breed of Mens Rights Activist, one who is interested in hearing the opinions of women and finding common ground.
About two and a half years ago, I declared I was absolutely finished with women. At an early age, I dealt with sexual abuse from a female family member and have had disappointments, mixed messages, broken promises, and a lot of pain caused by women in my life. I consider myself a sensitive, nice guy who is looking for companionship but unfortunately, the women I have been with have lied to me, criticized me, deceived me, and left me for men who treat them badly, and in some cases, physically abuse them. I’ve been called a pussy and been tossed out and traded up for “bad boys” multiple times. I had a mother who told me not to be a wimp and to take it like a man when I got stung by a bee – I was nine years old. I questioned who I was, and the women that were telling me to be something different than what I was.
Thank goodness I was able to pick myself up by the bootstraps and go on with life. I traveled the world and made a career for myself but I was bitter about my experiences with the opposite sex. I explored and realized I was bi-sexual. I began to search the internet for other men that felt like I did or had stories like mine. I found a group who call themselves “Men Going Their Own Way” (MGTOW) that I could really relate to. Originally, I thought that these MGTOW’s would be ugly, loser creeps, sitting in a their mothers’ basements, blaming women for their problems. I was wrong. These are successful men who are excited about life: bankers, attorneys, artists, heating/air conditioning technicians, actuaries, chiropractors, entrepreneurs, etc. I got to know these guys and we wrote emails and exchanged stories. These men are dealing with real pain caused by women in marriages, with children, professionally, and sexually. They feel underrepresented, and that they live in a society where men aren’t allowed to be open and sensitive, to cultivate an emotional intelligence. Some of them even talk about a world with no women, or choosing to live lives without them. I listened.
I disappeared into the manosphere. I read books on masculinity, tons of blogs and forums, and I even donated to The National Center for Men. Still I found no resolution. I wanted to scream, “This is crazy! There has to be a solution to this so-called war of the sexes”. So many broken and hurt people on both sides just shouting on websites. I felt frustrated and powerless.
Finally, I came across a website called manboobz, created by David Futrelle, which was different from all the other sites I’d visited. It encouraged a civil dialogue between MRA’s and Feminists. No one’s opinion was censored, women and men were sharing with each other, anything was open for discussion and people were listening.
I basically went on the website to be a representative, to convey some of the views in the MGTOW community. MRA leaders also tackle issues such as parental rights, equality in divorce cases, histories of abuse, etc. I am most concerned about eradicating “toxic masculinity” and some of the social and spiritual hazards of being male. But I had a hard time getting the words right and I didn’t know much about feminism or the issues that women’s rights groups are dealing with. The manboobz community was tough on me. I had a lot to learn about philosophy, history, current events, psychology and pain, but these were burning questions for my heart and mind. I was inspired to start my own blog – with a feminist.
How would I find an articulate, femme-forward woman who is willing to come on-board with this MGTOW vision I have? Would there be a feminist out there willing to work with a man who considered gender separatism?
One of my friends suggested I place an ad on Craigslist under the writing gig category. I had never done this before. Only one woman gave me a phone number in her email, and she seemed really interested in what I had to say. We spoke for about an hour and realized we were both on the same page!
Then a few weeks later, Lily another feminist woman left me her phone number, and we also spoke for about an hour and were also on the same page. Both Laura and Lily are both on the West Coast and I am on the east coast.
So I am starting this blog with Laura, a 29-year-old feminist, and Lily both 3,000 miles away in Los Angeles. THE HALFWAY POINT will be about issues that affect men and women daily, stereotypes, relationships, current events, other activist blogs, and everything in between. I invite both men and women to join me in creating a dialogue that encourages all of us to discover and define what our own way is! Gay, MRA, Bisexual, housewife, Femme-nazi, MGTOW, transgender, new wave, old school, men and women, come one, come all.